You don't realize how cruddy you feel until it is too late to stop the madness. I'm sitting at the walk-in waiting for lab results to come back. They think I have mono. So I know that I've been pretty pooped out lately and have been feeling pretty yucky. I didn't realize until the last few minutes how run down I really feel.
There is so much going on in our lives right now. Jared lost his job a week ago, we're talking about relocating, I'm trying to be supermom and wife and save the day. I think it is someone else's turn to be the cruise director for awhile. I have just wanted to crawl in bed and sleep for the past week or so but have just tried pushing through it.
I'm worried too about PPD a little. I feel good most of the time but I have moments where I am uncertain of what I am doing and/or if I am doing enough. I am so hard on myself and hold myself (and others) to such high standards. I'm realizing it is really hard to continually live at a "10" everyday. I just want to be the best Mommy for Christopher and a good wife to Jared. I guess that the rest - the house, the laundry, the dishes, the cleaning et al do not have to be top priority...somehow need to reconcile that I don't have as much time and that it is ok to let some things go. Otherwise I need a live in maid or Jared needs a second wife to keep the house together.
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