You don't realize how cruddy you feel until it is too late to stop the madness. I'm sitting at the walk-in waiting for lab results to come back. They think I have mono. So I know that I've been pretty pooped out lately and have been feeling pretty yucky. I didn't realize until the last few minutes how run down I really feel.
There is so much going on in our lives right now. Jared lost his job a week ago, we're talking about relocating, I'm trying to be supermom and wife and save the day. I think it is someone else's turn to be the cruise director for awhile. I have just wanted to crawl in bed and sleep for the past week or so but have just tried pushing through it.
I'm worried too about PPD a little. I feel good most of the time but I have moments where I am uncertain of what I am doing and/or if I am doing enough. I am so hard on myself and hold myself (and others) to such high standards. I'm realizing it is really hard to continually live at a "10" everyday. I just want to be the best Mommy for Christopher and a good wife to Jared. I guess that the rest - the house, the laundry, the dishes, the cleaning et al do not have to be top priority...somehow need to reconcile that I don't have as much time and that it is ok to let some things go. Otherwise I need a live in maid or Jared needs a second wife to keep the house together.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Toofers!
Okay ONE tooth, but ayup! The boy has popped a tooth. I'm a terrible writer and forgot to tell you - with all the sick and stuff I'm sure you'll understand! Bottom right on Monday the 15th. It still is not completely visible but you can feel it! He was chewing and chewing on Grandpa Jeff's finger at his baptism luncheon and "now we know why". We - Jared's Mom, myself, Grandpa Jeff, Grandma Arlene - all thought he was teething but it seemed to go on and on and on! Ms. Ann from Daycare finally noticed it on Monday - she wrote me a note on his daily sheet. He was sleeping by the time I had him at home. I, of course, had to wake him up and stick my finger in there to check things out! Yay Christopher!
Here's a favorite picture of mine! Christopher is so lucky to have Great Grandma Gracie! She just love love loves him!
Here's a favorite picture of mine! Christopher is so lucky to have Great Grandma Gracie! She just love love loves him!
Monday, November 22, 2010
Four Months Four Weeks
We made it four months and four weeks without any major issues. Day care called last Friday and asked me to get Christopher as he had a fever. Babies get fevers, I get that.
Because I am a safer than sorry kinda Momma yet I called our Physician and we got in Friday afternoon - what the heck is it with kids getting sick on Fridays so that we have the whole freakin' weekend to fret?? So I pushed to get in - I swear the nurse on the phone must have skipped her empathy classes. I wanted to reach through the phone. I had to pull the bitch card out on the phone with her while I was picking Christopher up at day care. I'm sure they were real impressed. So we went in and yes he has a fever and yes he has a good cold. OK thanks. Pat on the back from the doctor and home we went.
Saturday was pure chaos. He was burning up and his nose ran like a faucet. My baby was one of "those kids" with the super snotty noses that I always gagged over in the past. YUKKO. But I was a trooper while Daddy went hunting and Christopher and I muddled through it - somehow. He cried and cried. His little voice is so hoarse. We contemplated taking him back in to the Walk-In but decided to wait it out.
Sunday morning we hung out - Jared let me go grocery shopping. I needed to get out of the house for a little bit. Christopher's fever was down and his nose seemed a little better. By the afternoon though we decided to take him in. His eyes were just watering and watering and super blood shot. I was 99% sure it was not pink eye but just wanted to make sure. And I wanted to ask if he could have a decongestant or something. He was struggling to take a bottle due to his nose being sooooo stuffy.
The magical answer is no decongestant and then she proceeded to say generally not until age 2 (OMG!). They checked him over and we found the first ear infection. I have been dreading it. A lot of Moms tell me that once you get one they are nonstop. I don't know what I can do to stop that from happening. Might have to put a call in to the chiropractor to get his opinion. I know when we were treating for colic he was super anit-antibiotic. We're three doses in tonight and seeing good results.
He has been such a trooper. I took him to day care for a couple hours today as I had a meeting that I needed to go to (am on layoff this week). He snoozed for the most part for the girls there. We came home and he was just a little ham for me. Trying to smile and just hang out. He even gave us a couple giggles! What a sweet sweet boy.
Oh! I am now an experienced projectile vomit Momma too. After the walk-in yesterday Jared dropped us off here at home and ran back in town to pick up his prescription. Christopher had been crying and crying in the car and I figured he was hungry. I try to settle him down a little before feeding him as we've had the too much air problem before. Well once he got that bottle in his mouth I sort of went with it. 6 ounces later he was "full" and I moved to burp him and thought huh you're not breathing real well. I put him over my shoulder to burp him and I swear that he must have spewed 60 ounces back out. Poor Kahlua girl took the most of it on her back, along with the ottoman, love seat, floor and down the back of my sweatshirt. I am fairly confident it was from having too much air from the crying. He also hadn't eaten that much in a few days. So maybe a combo of too much too fast. Poor guy. Kahlua didn't mind and it cleaned up pretty easy - Yay for stain resistant carpet or whatever the hell protection plan we got! The loves eat cleaned up well too - Kahlua on the other hand...needs a bath!
Because I am a safer than sorry kinda Momma yet I called our Physician and we got in Friday afternoon - what the heck is it with kids getting sick on Fridays so that we have the whole freakin' weekend to fret?? So I pushed to get in - I swear the nurse on the phone must have skipped her empathy classes. I wanted to reach through the phone. I had to pull the bitch card out on the phone with her while I was picking Christopher up at day care. I'm sure they were real impressed. So we went in and yes he has a fever and yes he has a good cold. OK thanks. Pat on the back from the doctor and home we went.
Saturday was pure chaos. He was burning up and his nose ran like a faucet. My baby was one of "those kids" with the super snotty noses that I always gagged over in the past. YUKKO. But I was a trooper while Daddy went hunting and Christopher and I muddled through it - somehow. He cried and cried. His little voice is so hoarse. We contemplated taking him back in to the Walk-In but decided to wait it out.
Sunday morning we hung out - Jared let me go grocery shopping. I needed to get out of the house for a little bit. Christopher's fever was down and his nose seemed a little better. By the afternoon though we decided to take him in. His eyes were just watering and watering and super blood shot. I was 99% sure it was not pink eye but just wanted to make sure. And I wanted to ask if he could have a decongestant or something. He was struggling to take a bottle due to his nose being sooooo stuffy.
The magical answer is no decongestant and then she proceeded to say generally not until age 2 (OMG!). They checked him over and we found the first ear infection. I have been dreading it. A lot of Moms tell me that once you get one they are nonstop. I don't know what I can do to stop that from happening. Might have to put a call in to the chiropractor to get his opinion. I know when we were treating for colic he was super anit-antibiotic. We're three doses in tonight and seeing good results.
He has been such a trooper. I took him to day care for a couple hours today as I had a meeting that I needed to go to (am on layoff this week). He snoozed for the most part for the girls there. We came home and he was just a little ham for me. Trying to smile and just hang out. He even gave us a couple giggles! What a sweet sweet boy.
Oh! I am now an experienced projectile vomit Momma too. After the walk-in yesterday Jared dropped us off here at home and ran back in town to pick up his prescription. Christopher had been crying and crying in the car and I figured he was hungry. I try to settle him down a little before feeding him as we've had the too much air problem before. Well once he got that bottle in his mouth I sort of went with it. 6 ounces later he was "full" and I moved to burp him and thought huh you're not breathing real well. I put him over my shoulder to burp him and I swear that he must have spewed 60 ounces back out. Poor Kahlua girl took the most of it on her back, along with the ottoman, love seat, floor and down the back of my sweatshirt. I am fairly confident it was from having too much air from the crying. He also hadn't eaten that much in a few days. So maybe a combo of too much too fast. Poor guy. Kahlua didn't mind and it cleaned up pretty easy - Yay for stain resistant carpet or whatever the hell protection plan we got! The loves eat cleaned up well too - Kahlua on the other hand...needs a bath!
Monday, November 15, 2010
This 'n That
Another week gone. Time is flying so quickly. While it makes the work weeks go fast the weekends seem to zoom even faster.
The time change has kind of mixed things up a little - I never even dreamed about this when thinking about having a baby and the issues that would come with it. The first few mornings we were up at 3:45 (ohmygoodness). Along with that, for whatever reason, he has been sleeping through the night. I was thrilled with the 6 hour stretches that he was finally giving me...NOW though it has been from about 6:00 to 3:45 or so. I keep it quiet and he usually goes back down around 5 am *just in time for me to get ready for work - what a buddy, huh? I'm pushing the envelope to 6:30 p.m. though we usually have bottle in mouth at 6:15. We'll get it. Little by little.
This past weekend we finally had Christopher's baptism. I tell ya, the kid is amazing. Everyone in church was amazed at how "good" he was. He really was super. Aunt Polly held him through the first half of the service. I love how she loves him (yes Polly I know you're reading this). She worries about hogging him. Let me tell ya, if anyone hogs him, I want it to be her! She's awesome with him! Anyway...during his baptism he was super - just squeaked a little when Pastor Craig poured the water on his head. Then when we went out to dinner everyone loved on him again. He even helped Grandpa Jeff teach the bartender at the restaurant how to make a proper Old Fashioned. Then proceeded to pass out - must be tough being a baby bartender. It was pretty cute!
We had another Physical Therapy appointment as well. I must tell you that I walked out of that appointment feeling ten feet tall and bullet proof. After the little struggles we had with side preferences, potential torticollis and the right arm use Jen told me that he is actually ahead of where he should be developmentally. It had been so frustrating the times before because he was always "behind" and it made me feel like I wasn't doing enough for/with him. We have a two - three month reprieve before we go back and were given a few little things to aim for but nothing to catch up on! It was so refreshing!
He's amazing...you know? I hold this little boy in my arms when he is sleeping and just am consistently overwhelmed with such emotion from the love that I feel for him. I have loved before but never like this. My heart is so full of happiness and love. I feel like I have finally figured it out. My job may not be the most perfect, I might not always love the car I drive or the clothes I wear, but at the end of the day there is always Christopher and that makes everything else...enough. Simply amazing what someone so little can do.
The time change has kind of mixed things up a little - I never even dreamed about this when thinking about having a baby and the issues that would come with it. The first few mornings we were up at 3:45 (ohmygoodness). Along with that, for whatever reason, he has been sleeping through the night. I was thrilled with the 6 hour stretches that he was finally giving me...NOW though it has been from about 6:00 to 3:45 or so. I keep it quiet and he usually goes back down around 5 am *just in time for me to get ready for work - what a buddy, huh? I'm pushing the envelope to 6:30 p.m. though we usually have bottle in mouth at 6:15. We'll get it. Little by little.
This past weekend we finally had Christopher's baptism. I tell ya, the kid is amazing. Everyone in church was amazed at how "good" he was. He really was super. Aunt Polly held him through the first half of the service. I love how she loves him (yes Polly I know you're reading this). She worries about hogging him. Let me tell ya, if anyone hogs him, I want it to be her! She's awesome with him! Anyway...during his baptism he was super - just squeaked a little when Pastor Craig poured the water on his head. Then when we went out to dinner everyone loved on him again. He even helped Grandpa Jeff teach the bartender at the restaurant how to make a proper Old Fashioned. Then proceeded to pass out - must be tough being a baby bartender. It was pretty cute!
We had another Physical Therapy appointment as well. I must tell you that I walked out of that appointment feeling ten feet tall and bullet proof. After the little struggles we had with side preferences, potential torticollis and the right arm use Jen told me that he is actually ahead of where he should be developmentally. It had been so frustrating the times before because he was always "behind" and it made me feel like I wasn't doing enough for/with him. We have a two - three month reprieve before we go back and were given a few little things to aim for but nothing to catch up on! It was so refreshing!
He's amazing...you know? I hold this little boy in my arms when he is sleeping and just am consistently overwhelmed with such emotion from the love that I feel for him. I have loved before but never like this. My heart is so full of happiness and love. I feel like I have finally figured it out. My job may not be the most perfect, I might not always love the car I drive or the clothes I wear, but at the end of the day there is always Christopher and that makes everything else...enough. Simply amazing what someone so little can do.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Sleepy Sunday
Well hello new followers! Thank you for following me, how exciting!
Christopher is napping...again. I've been able to get quite a bit done around the house; he's been snoozy all weekend. Such a cute little snore! I *can* finally say that he isn't sick anymore. I believe the cold is done - until next time. Day care has had some hella colds and sicknesses. They just implemented a mandatory hand washing upon entering the facility rule. I'm very thankful for that. I hope that everyone respects it.
We had our 4 month check-up last Monday. Little Dude was 15 lbs 5 oz and 24.25 inches. Holy Moly! Dr. Ann said he's perfect. I already knew that but it sure is nice to be reminded by a professional. It has been an absolutely amazing 4 months. There isn't a day that goes by that I am not completely amazed by him.
I put a tub of newborn to three months clothes away this last week. Jared and I were in awe of the teeny tiny NB clothing. I barely remember him ever being that small. I went way overboard on buying stuff for him. There were tons of things he never wore or only wore once. I jokingly said we'd have to have a boy this next time (Lord knows I'd be head over heals either way) since we already have so much boy stuff and I seem to have the boy stuff down pat. He's pretty darn easy (now!).
We've been practicing with the rice cereal this past week. I think I am ready for day care to give it a try this week. He's doing an awesome job and probably gets 75% of it now. I tend to stand to close to him and he kicks me and the bowl and it goes flying. Still learning the logistics that work for both of us.
Jared and I were able to get away for the afternoon last Sunday. We dropped Christopher off at Grandma & Grandpa Olson's and we went down to Appleton to do some shopping and have dinner together. Nothing fancy, but super nice to just get away together. We really need to keep up with that otherwise I feel like we lose track of each other.
Christopher has been rolling over in his sleep and staying on his tummy. We made it through the two weeks of waking up every hour mid-roll. I'm a bit leery about his sleeping on his stomach. Dr. Ann said it was "OK". Apparently I need to sleep too (who knew?!). So our nights have been a lot better. I'm hoping to sleep train him through his first waking and then we'll have the 3:00 feeding and more sleep! I am shooting to keep him up past 7:00 too. We'll see how THAT goes with the silly time change.
We've been venturing out a little bit more again. We went out to dinner with Jared's parents on Friday night. Christopher was SO good and easy. Jared had to cut my steak for me so I could eat one handed but other then that I think we got it figured out! Little Dude & I went grocery shopping yesterday and that was quite easy. He was awesome. I'm feeling more confident again!
Christopher is napping...again. I've been able to get quite a bit done around the house; he's been snoozy all weekend. Such a cute little snore! I *can* finally say that he isn't sick anymore. I believe the cold is done - until next time. Day care has had some hella colds and sicknesses. They just implemented a mandatory hand washing upon entering the facility rule. I'm very thankful for that. I hope that everyone respects it.
We had our 4 month check-up last Monday. Little Dude was 15 lbs 5 oz and 24.25 inches. Holy Moly! Dr. Ann said he's perfect. I already knew that but it sure is nice to be reminded by a professional. It has been an absolutely amazing 4 months. There isn't a day that goes by that I am not completely amazed by him.
I put a tub of newborn to three months clothes away this last week. Jared and I were in awe of the teeny tiny NB clothing. I barely remember him ever being that small. I went way overboard on buying stuff for him. There were tons of things he never wore or only wore once. I jokingly said we'd have to have a boy this next time (Lord knows I'd be head over heals either way) since we already have so much boy stuff and I seem to have the boy stuff down pat. He's pretty darn easy (now!).
We've been practicing with the rice cereal this past week. I think I am ready for day care to give it a try this week. He's doing an awesome job and probably gets 75% of it now. I tend to stand to close to him and he kicks me and the bowl and it goes flying. Still learning the logistics that work for both of us.
Jared and I were able to get away for the afternoon last Sunday. We dropped Christopher off at Grandma & Grandpa Olson's and we went down to Appleton to do some shopping and have dinner together. Nothing fancy, but super nice to just get away together. We really need to keep up with that otherwise I feel like we lose track of each other.
Christopher has been rolling over in his sleep and staying on his tummy. We made it through the two weeks of waking up every hour mid-roll. I'm a bit leery about his sleeping on his stomach. Dr. Ann said it was "OK". Apparently I need to sleep too (who knew?!). So our nights have been a lot better. I'm hoping to sleep train him through his first waking and then we'll have the 3:00 feeding and more sleep! I am shooting to keep him up past 7:00 too. We'll see how THAT goes with the silly time change.
We've been venturing out a little bit more again. We went out to dinner with Jared's parents on Friday night. Christopher was SO good and easy. Jared had to cut my steak for me so I could eat one handed but other then that I think we got it figured out! Little Dude & I went grocery shopping yesterday and that was quite easy. He was awesome. I'm feeling more confident again!
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